Pattaya Massage Parlors

Guest Post by: Bart

Apart from those great soapie massages that are on offer, there are lots of different massages to choose from. Starting with fish massage (they bring those fish from Turkey, it is a weird feeling at first but I recommend trying it), through various types of traditional massages (shoulder, head or feet) finishing on oil massage! I was always curious how to recognise a place where you can also get something extra. Well, after a few trips under my belt I want to share that knowledge with you!

During one of my trips we slept on Soi Honey. If you are looking for a ‘right’ massage that is a soi to visit! It offers all you need! Filled with massage places and small bars, close to Soi LK Metro with a few nice gogos and 2 minutes walking away from ‘Kiss, Food and Drink’ restaurant, it offers lots of attractions 24 hours a day!

One of the places which you should check is a ‘CULTURE CLUB’ (opposite Sawasdee Sunshine hotel). During my last trip I was walking through Soi Honey with my lady, who said: ‘You see, two minutes massage! Only young lady waiting’ Oh yes, I knew exactly what she was talking about.

Culture Club offers oil massage with a happy ending.

I remember visiting it with Tom last April. It was a rainy day and we slept in Sawasdee Sunshine (that was my 3rd trip to Thailand, 5 of us and plenty of girls. Thai girls!). We did not fancy walking around and just crossed the street and walked inside.

As we walked in there was, out of the blue, a beautiful girl standing next to me (same same soi 6 you should choose your girl before you enter or other way they gonna do it for you). Her name was Yui and she had a beautiful, dark brown skin (22yo). Obviously, being a newbie means that you don’t really know what is going to happen. I did not have much money on me as I did not expect any extras.

Next, we went to another building where I saw lots of beds (on wheels, like in a hospital) with white curtains around and shadows of girls sitting on guys (sitting and massaging!) For some reason it did remind me of a movie ‘Shogun’ with Richard Chamberlain. There was some magic there!

After being there a few times, I have to say that the whole oil massage was more of a teaser to make me horny. At the end she started touching me gently and giggling. I remember reading about Pattaya on Dexter Horn’s page, who was laughing that, despite their inability to say something in English, they can all clearly pronounce “1000 baht”!  It wasn’t different this time. The problem was that I had only 700B in my pocket (as I said I went there just for a massage!). I tried to explain it but she had no idea what I was talking about. Finally, I took money out of my pocket and she smiled and started giving me blowjob (and who said that intercultural communication is impossible without knowing the language)! I did not last more than 10 minutes and did cum in her mouth. She started choking a bit but, at the same time, looked so sweet! After all, she took me under shower and washed me.

Tip: Like on Soi Honey, when the shower is NOT inside the room, you should ALWAYS take your wallet with you! Any girl can come and pinch your stuff! I am not saying that this is what they are waiting for but be careful!

I remember coming back to our hotel around 4am. Suddenly, I heard a girl shouting: ‘Hello massage!’ (in a low season you may hear: ‘hello short time:)) We could not believe that she was still there at that God forbidden time so we stopped to talk to her. It turned out that a few places (end of Soi Honey where it connects with Soi Buakhao) are open 24 hours and the girls work different shifts! Well, who would expect that you can get a massage at 4am!

After one of our gym workouts we were sitting in ‘Kiss, food and drink’ restaurant. I could still feel that pump (and pain after doing squats) so we decided to go for a ‘normal’ massage. We did not have to look far as there was one just next to us. It is called Great Massage.

Great Massage in Pattaya provides a good Oil Massage even if you don't get the "extras".

Tip: When you look for a place to get something extra as well, look for a two-story building. In most places they do shoulder/head/feet massage on the lover floor to attract other people to come in, and for the rest you go upstairs.

There were a few girls sitting outside but, as I was not bothered about any extras I just walked in (Tom however has chosen his girl). When we got upstairs there was a girl already waiting for me. Her name was Sukita and she was a really friendly girl. Limited English and probably one of the most plain looking girls I have seen in Pattaya but… the massage she gave me was out of this world!

Actually, it started with me moaning and groaning because it was a bit painful! She smiled and said: ‘All farang like baby, everything hurt!’ It is surprising that such a small girl can create such a force to handle a 90kg guy! While she was massaging me, there was a group of Geordies coming in. It was really quiet inside and, suddenly, one of those chap’s phone started ringing! Yes, it was BIG BEN! I could hear Tom giggling and suddenly he shouts: ‘Ok girls, 5 o’clock get some tea and biscuits and don’t forget about milk!’ (it was 5pm!) After a few seconds we all burst laughing wildly:) It took a couple of minutes for us to come down. Obviously, the girls were all sitting there puzzled not knowing why everyone is laughing! At the end, both girls asked whether we want something extra but we had different plans for the evening!

Tip: The way most of those places work (not just massage parlors, also beauty saloons) is that a girl gets percentage (usually 40%) of what you pay and the owner keeps the rest. If she gives extras there is no problem. But not all of them do that so remember to give her 100B tip! Don’t be like those posh Yorkshire men counting every bloody penny!

Another place which I have visited (this time together with my lady) was called ‘J&B massage’, situated just after that small gym on the right hand side on Soi Buakhao.

J & B Massage on Soi Buakhao is a good place to unwind after a long trip.

I had a really nice girl massaging me. Darkish skin, slightly over 30y ears old, slightly chubby, with nice milfs (tits) and firm toot (ass)! I did not ask for her name as that would mean ‘finish forever’ with my lady.

It was a nice and quiet place. They had around 8 mattresses there and a few lovely ladies (all rather +30yo but don’t make any assumptions based on their age. I had a few milfs as well and would recommend to you to try! Both times, that meant better massage and more passion!) As always, my lady (we have been together for a while) asked to lie next to me and no curtains!

It was a really nice oil massage, something I really needed after a long journey! At the end she started massaging me in a bit more sensual way. Whether that was her kinky sense of humor or just me feeling horny again I don’t know but the result was quite apparent. When we were coming back, my girl asked me if I like poom pui (curvy in this case) ladies because that girl was sexy. Can’t remember what I said but lack of sex that night indicated that it wasn’t a good answer! Not sure whether there is a good answer to that question!

You may want to ask: how do I know they give extras there if I was with my lady? Well, going somewhere with your Thai lady means that she will usually check things out to ‘protect you’! Because my lady is from outside of P4P scene she was talking to a lot of them (in every place we have visited!). At first, I thought she was being friendly but later on, she did tell me that she was checking whether they do any extras! Because ‘if they do, we not go again’ Where else would I get that kind of support?

At the end, I want to mention one more thing: not all the guys do it but, IMHO, it is a reasonable approach. Same same in beer bars and gogos; when you find a girl you like, chat to her for a couple of minutes and ask what she does and how much for something extra! Believe me, being there with her sitting on top and touching you, you are NOT on the position to negotiate! I have heard about guys paying as much as 1000B just for a hand job because they were so horny! A man is a strange creature and the earlier you switch off your brain the faster you baths flow!